Saturday, May 29, 2010

I'm Soooooo Tired!!!

This week has been really long. Between doctors appointments, physiotherapy, and life in general I am feeling really tired. With the pain blocks not working the way that I would like them to, and facing having to make a decision to either have the spinal implant done I am feeling overwhelmed. It's just one of those weeks where I just need some time to myself, to figure out what step comes next if there is one.
When things get this way it's at times like these where I ask God for wisdom as to how to handle everything.

As of earlier in the week I was told that in order to help my pain I would need the spinal implant. As I walked out of the specialists office I wasn't so sure that this was going to be that easy a decision to make. My physiotherapists and myself still hope that physio after the pain blocks will show more results. All week long I have been questioning if this is the next move to be making. Do I want to put my body through this? Do I want to take the risks involved? Am I going to benefit from this or is this just another false hope for relief from the pain?

All week I have been asking God to answer all those questions for me. To give me wisdom to make the right choices. The last thing I want to do is make a quick decision that I end up paying for in the end. As I started to think about this and pray about it, God really has helped me sort out my emotions this week. He has helped me step back from things, and take a break from the constant flood of emotions that fill my brain and cause it to race ahead.

As the week has progressed my body seems have been telling me that it needs to rest, and relax a bit before I stand up and go to battle again against this ugly disease. I often stand in amazement of how God's timing comes into play. Have you ever stopped to think about the times that God helps us? He is always there to pick us up when we feel weak, or when we need encouragement. Just as I think I have no more energy left He always fills my tank with more gas to keep fighting. I don't know how things would be if it weren't for God.

It just all comes down to having faith and having enough trust in Him. That He will provide all the answers that you will need, as well as the strength to get through anything that you face. There has now been another fork in the road and I have to trust God to lead me down the right path. It's at those times that your in the trenches doing battle where I need Him there with me.

I am going to rest this weekend and take some time for myself. I'm going to rest my mind to help with my pain and spend some time with my family. I've seen enough doctors for the moment, and now it's time to spend time with the best doctor of them all GOD!!

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Update On My Nerve Blocks For CRPS!!

Well here I am once again for this weeks post. I have to say that I'm not really back to normal. This weekend I'm out at the cottage just taking it easy trying to rest as much as I can. I'm still feeling tired and my back is still sore, as well as suffering from some headaches. After the first two procedures there weren't really to many problems except for a really sore back. After the last procedure it seems like my body has been having a hard time getting back to normal! Whatever normal is!!!

This week has really been hard because on one side of it my body has been trying to recover from the procedures themselves. On the other side of the coin my body has been trying to push forward and focus on my therapy. My week has been very interesting to say the least. We are getting some increased movement in my leg and at times the pain level has come down. The way that I describe my pain level to my therapists is on a scale from 1 being the least to a 10 being the worst. After the pain blocks my pain levels were sitting around a 5 or 6. After the blocks my pain has been going back up to a 8 or 9.

So it seems at the moment I'm doing some real bouncing up and down and it's really too early to tell what's going to happen. At the same time my body is still trying to get over the procedures. Throw in some headaches and back pain and you have yourself a real party!!! So now that things are trying to settle it will be interesting to see if my pain levels come down and stay down. I'm really praying that they do come down. At the moment they keep going up and down.

I will be going to see the pain specialist on Tuesday and we will go over the procedures and what the next step is. As I mentioned before I am already on the list for the spinal cord implant however we do have to give this procedure some time to see if we can get some results. The only way to do that is to keep going really hard at therapy. Another reason that my body feels like its been through a war.

It's been a really draining couple of weeks, not only for me but for my family as well. My wife has had to do even more than she already does which has been hard on her. We are all tired and the timing of a long weekend couldn't be better. Now we all get the chance to just relax.

You may be asking why would I put myself through this to have it fail??? What if it works!!!! There's a 50/50 chance isn't there. If I want to get better then I have to try don't I. This is what I'm talking about when I say that you have to fight on and on, and it's God that gives me that fight. Am I going to get discouraged if this doesn't work? No! I'll just keep trying until I get better. Anyway I'll be back in a couple of days after I take a few more days at the lake. I'll head back home ready to fight some more to overcome CRPS! Does anyone want to join me in fighting CRPS! You can't give up or it will overcome you!!!!

Monday, May 17, 2010

Update!

Hi Everybody! Sorry for the long delay, I was intending on updating you through the series of procedures however I wasn't really feeling up to it. Today was the last of my three procedures, and I'm glad that they are over with for the time being. I am in more pain than I was expecting on the third, and after going through a pretty tough week my body is tired.

As I mentioned before I had three procedures done this week, each time having the same procedure. Each day I went to the hospital to have two needles fed into my back to do a nerve block. The procedures are spaced two days apart to give you time to recover in between. The worst part has to be the back pain that you have to suffer through. The medical staff were great and I can't say enough about the way that they treated me.

At the moment the results are sort of up in the air. Although my pain levels are coming down a bit after treatment, they are going back up again several hours after treatment. I'm not going to say that things aren't working however it's very up and down at this time. I will say that we have been able to gain some movement in my leg which is a real positive. I'm just trying to keep moving forward and at the same time see some results. I am also being put on the wait list for a spinal implant if these procedures don't work.

As my therapists have now said it's time to train like an Olympic athlete and really try to work as hard as you can, so that's what I'm prepared to do. As I am not feeling all that well I'm going to keep tonight's post short. Hopefully in the next couple of days I'll start to feel better, and then I'll let you know more. Talk to everyone in a couple!!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Ready As I'll Ever Be!!!

Today the phone rang first thing in the morning and it was the hospital booking my procedure for tomorrow. My post is going to be short today as I'm a little bit of a basket case trying to stay focused. I have that mix of nervous and excited running through my body at the moment.

If you don't remember I'm having a nerve block done first thing in the morning, the first of three procedures if all goes well. I can't believe that in 24hrs I may not have very much pain in my left leg. I'll be sure to keep everyone updated and let you know day by day what I am experiencing. I will be the third person at our rehab centre to have recieved this procedure and I'm hoping and praying for the same results, that is to be pain free!!

I couldn't believe how quickly everything happened, and I almost dropped the phone when she said she wanted to book my appointment for the next day. It really doesn't give you any time to think about it. The nice thing about all this is that I go straight from the hospital tomorrow to physio to start walking!!

Well I have to get a little sleep before the big day tomorrow. I'm going into this like anything else with a positive attitude. This could be the day that God changes everything. I will talk to everyone very soon, and I'll keep everyone updated from start to finish!!

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Arm Yourself With The Answers

I was thinking today about how I have been meeting CRPS straight in the face, and not letting it win. There are two answers that I have for this. The first and foremost is my faith. As I've mentioned before without God I wouldn't be able to face each and every way that I do. The second way is that I'm trying to arm myself with as much information as I can about CRPS.

What I mean by arming myself is that I try to stay up to date with the just about anything that I can regarding CRPS. That could be the latest treatments, or even the latest theories behind what is going on in the brain. You'd be amazed at how many questions you can answer just by arming yourself with the information that you need. There are all kinds of ways to source the information that you need. You can go on sites like the ones that I have listed on my blog, or you can source the internet. Working with my physiotherapists has been my biggest source of information.

As I read blogs and I talk to people, I'm finding that people either make a choice to support therapy and really try to get better, or they give up on it thinking that it's not working because they aren't getting better. Understanding CRPS and what's going on in our body, helps you understand why certain things work and don't work with your therapy. I am very lucky to work with therapists who give me lots of information about CRPS, and why my body is acting the way it is. They are always looking for new information and as they get it they educate me. From there we work with how my body is reacting to treatment, and help each other with my treatment plan.

What's important is that as therapy tries different treatments on you there is a real need for you to give them feedback on how it's working. Giving them feedback is only going to help them help you in the long run. Letting them know what does and doesn't work is important because they need that information in order to try to help us. We are the ones that are affected by this condition not the therapists, if we let them know as much as possible about what's going on then they learn from us.

As the therapists and doctors have educated me it has taken away a lot of stress and worry. Isn't that a big part of making our pain better? Sure there are still all kinds of answers that I would like, however I'm educating myself with as much as possible. Talking to others who suffer from the CRPS also helps. We answer questions for each other and give each other valuable information that were looking for. So instead of keeping to yourself put yourself out there and make friends. As the saying goes " there is strength in numbers " .

If you feel like you need answers, then don't just sit back and expect that they are going to find you. You need to find the answers any way you can. If you aren't getting answers from your doctor then ask!! If you want more info on CRPS itself then you need to source that info!! Don't sit back and become defeated by this illness because in no way does it have to defeat you. Arm yourself with as much as you can and you will find that you become stronger in your fight to overcome your illness. It will also help you in making the choices that you might find youself needing to make.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

A Positive Step Towards No Pain!!

Today's post is really about not giving up when you think that there isn't any end to the pain. Yesterday I went and saw a pain specialist about trying to control my pain because as all of us know that's the big challenge with CRPS. After being told at one point that nerve blocks would not work I have finally been told that we will go ahead and try a nerve block for my leg. If you don't already know I suffer from CRPS in my left leg and my left arm.

From the minute I walked in the room to see this specialist I knew that this was going to be a good experience. He then presented me with two types of procedures that we could attempt, the first being the nerve block. If this doesn't work then he wants to go to a spinal cord implant that would hopefully control the pain. In his opinion he thinks it's going to take the implant to have an affect on my pain.

What I was impressed with was that this specialist understood what those of use with chronic pain go through. He was understanding and didn't try to minimize the pain that we feel on a day to day basis. At the same time he didn't try to give me answers to appease me, saying that there was a chance that this may not work. This is what we need from our specialists that see us, that combination of caring and understanding mixed with the ability to give us the facts.

So in the next couple of weeks I will be going in for the first of three procedures. I can't say that I'm looking forward to the procedure however I am looking forward to what the results are. I guess you could say that there is a little bit of nervousness mixed in with excitement at the moment, as I wait for the phone to ring with my date for the procedure.

I'm being told that there is potential that my pain could be reduced considerably if not completly. It's hard not to stop thinking that things in the next couple of weeks things could really change, not to mention what this means for my family! There is still a really long road ahead and I'm trying to keep everything in perspective in case the blocks don't work.

I'm just trying to say in all this is not to give up fighting in whatever sittuation or stage that you are in with your CRPS. A couple of weeks ago it was things as usual, fighting and standing in faith the way that I always do. Now all of a sudden I've been put in contact with a doctor who I really like, and who really seems to understand what we go through with our pain. I don't believe for a second that this is something that God doesn't have his hand involved in. I'll keep you posted in the weeks to come as the events unfold!!
 
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