Sunday, September 19, 2010

Reaching Your Limits!!

Today has just been one of those days! I'm tired because my physio took a lot out of me today and it's taking every last ounce of energy to cope with my pain. I've been back and forth between the kids school three times today and what finally did it was when my 6yr old had a redundant conversation about how many days she had been in school this week. I answered the question for her and she proceeded to ask again, and so once again I answered her. It finally ended in her having a meltdown on the drive home, apparently I wasn't understanding the question or something like that!!  I just want to go my happy place today!! Oh! Did I mention that I have to go to parent night at the school tonight!

On day's like today my stress level is a little higher, and therefore my pain gets a little more intense. My plans tonight will be to come home, get into bed and get lost in the good book that I'm reading. Hopefully I'll be able to get lost in my book, and forget about all the extra stress that my nervous system is trying to deal with. Reading seems to help me relax because I'm able to take my mind away from the pain. I'm also looking forward to piece and quite.

Ok! It's time to get myself out of this funk that I'm in and put a smile on my face. I couldn't finish writing yesterday because I just didn't have it in me. The good news is that I'm more relaxed today and in a better mood, plus it always helps that my pain is better than yesterday. In a little while the family will be packed up and heading to the lake for the night. It truly is one of the most relaxing places for me. I truly believe that God has blessed us in giving us such an amazing place.

I really feel that this week has been tough not only on me but on the rest of the family as well. From time to time it gets really hard and it becomes tough to keep fighting this battle. When your in the trenches fighting it can be hard, and sometimes you may feel lost or your confidence may seem shaken. It's at those times that I draw upon God for strength and wisdom as to how to keep fighting. I've really struggled this week to keep things together, constantly trying not to lose it!! At times I've felt as though I've lost my strength and fight that's within me! Trying not to let the pain win like it wants to.

It's now day three of trying to write this, and I' m going to try and finish what I started. It's hard at the best of times for me to try and control what's happening to my body. What I need to do is get my focus back on my family, and what they need from me. I need to find the strength to get back up from all the pain and other things that have been happening, and be that father they need me to be. The only way I can do that though is with God at my side. My plans are to enjoy a Sunday afternoon with my kids and wife and to laugh and play with the ones I love!! As I finish off this post I want to leave you with an inspiring song that encourages me and hopefully will do the same for you.

2 comments:

  1. Hello! I read some of your posts and I understand your difficulty. Never lose hope. You have a beautiful family and so many other good things, look forward. The science has made incredible discoveries. Who knows the future can be better soon? Have faith.

    I follow you now.

    May the Peace be upon you.

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  2. "...the extra stress that my nervous system is trying to deal with..."

    Boy that just captures it right there. You try to live your live like everyone else, or at least like you did in the old days before you got sick. But when you have a neurological disease sometimes you simply forget that ordinary, everyday life puts demands on your body that your nervous system just can't meet.

    Remembering, and being kind to yourself, can make all the difference.


    Thanks for the reminder. :) Be well.

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